Adoption Issues

In addition to my training as a psychotherapist, I have personal experience that makes me uniquely qualified to work with adoption issues. I am an interracial-international adoptee. I have personally experienced the confusion of being placed in a culture in which everything changed; language, people, food, smells, and traditions. Additionally, I gave a child up for adoption at a young age. So, I had to learn to cope with the shock of being given up for adoption as a young child, and I endured the the devastation of giving up a child. I understand the complexity of emotions associated with adoption from both the theoretical and personal points of view. I authored a memoir about my adoption and the reunion with my birth family. I have given public speeches about adoption, and I have been trained to help others with adoption issues. 

You are an adoptee: As an adoptee, you may seek to understand yourself and the feelings you have about your life and who you are. Perhaps you struggle with finding your own identity and facing life's choices. Or maybe others tell you that you are lucky to be adopted. (But you may not feel lucky.) Many adoptees find it difficult to connect deeply with others and wonder why. They feel like outsiders, like they don't belong, or they have difficulty with trust in relationships. Some are curious about their birth families and want to find out more about their adoptions but don’t want to offend their adoptive parents. 

You've placed your child for adoption: If you had a child and gave him or her up for adoption, you may struggle with feelings of sadness, guilt, shame, worries, and regrets. These feelings may be overwhelming. You may wonder if you made the right choice. You may wonder how your child has adjusted to their adoptive family and would like someone to talk to about your feelings and thoughts.

You've adopted a child: Adopting a child can feel wonderful and overwhelming at the same time. Perhaps you worry how and if your child will adapt as a family member, or you wonder how you will adapt to parenting your new child. Maybe you worry about bonding with your child or how your child will bond and attune with you. You may struggle at times with your child’s behavior and wonder if there is more you can do to help your child adjust. Sometimes your adopted child's needs are different from those of his or her peers. Or maybe you notice he or she may not be developing in the same way as his or her peers. 

Interracial adoption: If you are an interracial adoptee, you may struggle with feeling that you straddle two cultures yet feel you don't fully belong to either. As an adoptee from another culture or race, you may feel that you have to choose one culture and/or race and reject the other. Or, as a parent adopting an interracial child, you may feel unsure how to attend to your child's birth-culture needs while he or she acclimates to the new culture.    

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